Self-love is not those expensive bath bombs and salon appointments, Self-love is taking care of yourself in different ways.
These days we see how many industries are flourishing in the garb of self-love. But is self-love what actually media shows to us?
So what actually is self-love?
Self-love is basically loving yourself the way you are. It should not be mistaken for being stubborn and refusing to change. Self-love also means improving yourself. Self-love could be small things like taking care of yourself, eating nice food, leaving addictions, educating yourself, etc.
Where does it come from?
The motivation for loving yourself comes from within. External factors like inspiration from others come up but they are only useful when your inner self is accepting the fact that you need to love yourself.
Types of Self-love
There are different ways to love yourself. It varies from individual to individual. Some common forms are-
1. Physical- Exercising, joining Zumba classes or taking care of yourself by meditation is common. But is it enough? Or is it just a marketing gimmick?
Physical self-love includes eating food on time, having your medicines on time, doing some activity that brings health to your body.
If you cannot afford expensive vegetables like broccoli, try eating capsicum instead of potatoes all the time. If you cannot go for that gym membership, try walking on grass for an hour.
2. Mental- Mental self-love is as important as the physical one. What do you put inside your head is as important as what you put inside your body. What thoughts do you think? Where are they coming from?
Are those negative thoughts an outcome of unresolved trauma? Is your belief about your body that it is ugly is because of constant advertisements of fairness cream around you? Try to find the root of your problem. Once you get to the root, you can find the solutions to them.
3. Economical- First of all, the economy is bad. Accept the fact. It’s not your fault that you have less money. Minimum wages are not enough to pay your bills most of the time.
What exactly is economical self-love? It is the art of avoiding to beat yourself in the name of work ethic and then cry when you are broke.
There are plenty of things sold to us that we may never need, avoid buying them. Sales are just another way to make you buy things. Think before buying “do I really need this?”.
Also, demand! Demand better wages. It becomes exhausting to travel from one corner of the city to another and spend 30-40% of our salaries on commute. If they aren’t paying for overtime, don’t do it.
Stop putting your value in your productivity, your job does not define you, you define you.
If a certain field is underpaying all the individuals, try to unite and ask for better payments. It’s your right to have a livable wage.
4. Emotional- Emotional well being is as important as any other. Seeking therapy is not a shameful thing. Cutting off toxic people from your life is mental cleanliness.
Understanding your emotions is as essential as managing your expenses. Notice what triggers you and why. Is your emotional intelligence good or bad? Find answers to these questions.
Leave that abusive partner or parent for your sake. Try to counter your abandonment issues by acknowledging them.
5. Sexual- This one is for those who feel sexual attraction or desire. Are you happy with this aspect of life? Is your partner compatible? Are you facing stigma? Counter it.
Try to find health professionals who are non-judgmental and get regularly checked.
Remember, nobody has a right to violate your consent even if they are your husband/wife/partner.
Are you having any addictions related to this aspect which damage your physical and mental health in the long run? Find a health professional to guide you.
Why do we need self-love?
When a person is at full peace with themselves, they can do wonders. One needs to love thyself for their own betterment. In this fast world where everything is a competition, we are constantly told that we aren’t good enough and we believe it. We need to look closer and ask ourselves, “it is true?”.
When an individual feels complete, as a whole, they are able to look above the market that feeds on their insecurity. Taking a stand for yourself is a part of self-love.
self-love means acceptance, affection and above all peace with yourself